Having a baby is possibly the biggest change you’ll ever experience in your life.
There are so many unknowns and a steep learning curve.
Of course, it will all be worth it because you’ll have a new child to love.
And you don’t have to go into it completely blind.
I personally was never comfortable feeding around anyone other than my husband.
Know this upfront and speak up for yourself.
Create your new boundaries and don’t be afraid."
You’ll also need to set boundaries around what you think is best for your baby.
My OB knew this so she tried to give me my best shot."
However, her plan didn’t turn out quite the way she wanted it to.
Around 20 percent of moms will experience a PMAD and ten percent of dads.
This can be upsetting because you won’t know why this is happening.
You will think something is inherently wrong with you."
Knowing ahead of time will help you mitigate some of these negative feelings and ideas.
O’Brien went on, “This is not your fault.
You are not alone.
And with help you might feel better.
I encourage you to seek help as soon as you feel like something is not right.
Get the help and support you need.”
Schwartz shared her postpartum depression story with me.
“When I was pregnant I had no clue about postpartum depression,” she said.
The benefits of nursing kept me going, but through a lot of coaching and tears."
Moreland agreed, sharing, “Breastfeeding may or may not come easily at first.
Don’t be afraid to bring in the experts, like a licensed lactation consultant to help you.
I needed one with both of my babies and they are four years apart in age.
However, I couldn’t have done it without a lactation consultant to help me.”
No matter how much you prepare, however, things come up.
Don’t turn away any offers of help and there is no shame in asking for more.
Whether it’s from friends and family or a postpartum doula or nanny, get the support you need.
There’s no special medal for going it alone."
The faster you seek help, the faster you will feel better."
Schwartz told me, “Everyone will have an opinion on the best way to feed your baby.
Focus on feeding your baby, not on what other people expect you to do.
Schwartz continued, “All you have to do is feed your baby.
O’Brien told me, “Having a baby is going to take a toll on your relationship.
Other parents will tell you this, they may even say it it will ruin your relationship.
You will think that’s not possible, because you have a great relationship with your partner.
for pull through this trying time, she recommended, “It is important to have a daily check-in.
Talk to each other about what you are experiencing.
Share the good things, but also talk about any challenges you are having.
you’re able to then offer a way to support each other.”
Even when you first meet your new child, don’t put expectations on how you should feel.
And that’s okay.
Don’t feel like a bad mom if your initial experience is more like mine was.”
It is a lot of hard work, and it doesn’t make you a bad parent.
Wagner told me, “Babies grow and change extremely rapidly during their first year.
Nothing lasts too long, which is comforting to know when you’re struggling with any newborn difficulties.
You will be well served to remember that this too shall pass.”
She did mention, however, that it may not happen quickly.
“The first year, especially the first four months, are a bit crazy.
“But there will come a day when you feel capable and in control again.
